Redbrick

Hostel Sex 101

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Written by Liz Crump

WHEN you get the urge to have some fun but you’re shar­ing a dorm with a snor­ing Ger­man and the com­mu­nal area is busy all hours with the com­ings and goings of a dozen other trav­ellers where can you go to get your fix? And, more impor­tantly, how can you feed your pas­sion with­out get­ting caught? Here are a few sug­ges­tions as to how to get down and dirty discreetly…

Bath­room – Prob­a­bly the most obvi­ous sug­ges­tion and the rea­son why? It’s the most prac­ti­cal. The vast major­ity of hos­tels have lock­able bath­rooms and those that don’t will at least have a lock­able cubi­cle (if this is not the case then why are you stay­ing there?). I don’t think I need to say any­thing fur­ther other than a hot and steamy bath­room can be rather sat­is­fy­ing and the noise of run­ning water can cover up any sug­ges­tive sounds.

Laun­dry Room – Again this is a room that could very well be locked and if not then is cer­tainly one of the more pri­vate rooms at cer­tain hours. A few coins in the wash­ing machine could add another dimen­sion – be aware it may be noisy and attract more atten­tion than you had planned – and a comfy towel bale gives for a nice soft land­ing. Just make sure it’s the clean, fresh laun­dry pile…

The Closet – Another lock­able sug­ges­tion, but also a smaller one. A closet or cup­board doesn’t give much room or very much com­fort for any­thing too adven­tur­ous and with dirty mops and strong bleach you prob­a­bly won’t hang around long enough to experiment.

Kitchen – Just don’t. There are times when you need to put your­self in other people’s shoes and let’s face it you wouldn’t take very kindly to a stray hair in your sand­wich! Plus the kitchen is guar­an­teed to always have some­one wan­der­ing in at any hour.

Out­side – This is prob­a­bly the most ver­sa­tile option and gives the most poten­tial for tick­ing a few more boxes. You are also guar­an­teed to find some­where that isn’t going to dis­turb or annoy any­one else. Take a walk around your hos­tel and depend­ing where you are in the world there will be some form of secluded space close by. You could try any of the fol­low­ing: a copse of trees, a beach (prefer­ably at night and take a towel), a bal­cony, the roof of your hos­tel (safety first!), a pool if your hos­tel has one, or even a lonely, secluded hammock…

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This article was posted on February 6th, 2010 at 9:32 am.